Internal Landscape

this is a very personal piece to me as it is my experience with the psychological state of mind, psychosis / I did not want to misrepresent this, which is why I used figures of myself / everyone who experiences psychosis, experiences it differently – this is in no way an accurate representation of how everyone feels during psychosis but only what it was like for me

for the first collage, I made it look as though my body was lava, being shot into fragments out of a volcano / I used an image I took which looks like phosphenes to me (phosphenes are the luminous floating stars, zigzags, swirls, spirals, squiggles, and other shapes that you see when closing your eyes tight and pressing them with your fingers) as the upper background / I did this because that is what it felt like during that period in time – a blur of shapes

in the second collage, there is a picture of me pulling my lip down with my hands with newspaper cutouts of the number “911” – to symbolize a call for help. I placed hands, like they were gouging out my eyes / this was to show that feeling in psychosis when you feel that people are after you, and to also show how I felt in that state of mind /

in the third collage, I created a scene where it looks like I falling at the subway station / I placed my brain in my chest for the above figure and my heart in my head in below figure – this was to  show the feeling of my organs being displaced in my body / I also added an image (I took of lightning) inside the lower silhouette to represent that psychosis felt like a storm / I added fragments of my diary entries from what I felt at that time and wrote down / I inverted colors of some images to show that out-of-body/alien-like experience